She would then read him the entries and beg to be punished for them. During her begging she would have to call herself every disparaging word and term...she knew and how she was not worthy of even wasting his time. When he administered the punishment she was always told to count out the number of strokes out loud and thank him after each one. If she forgot to count or thank him, or if she lost count then they would start over, and another demerit would be added for inattentiveness.The journal was. The sun was very bright and low behind me. In front of me, the sky was full of dark receding storm clouds. Houses and trees sprang up where there had been boats. My field of vision narrowed to the height and width of an open doorway, but the gentle rocking continued. A little disoriented, I took stock. I was lying on the couch, the lights had come back on, and my upper body lay across Sandra’s lap. She held me in her arms rocking me and crying softly. She pressed her lips to the side of my. More

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