‘Would you like me to shave your legs, Annie?’ ‘Actually, I can do it, if you’d rather not.’ ‘Well, I’m already here, and I don’t have...a lot of gauze around to stop you from bleeding to death from the nicks.’ She turned around and smacked the top of my head and said, ‘Asshole,’ with a smile. ‘Just for that you have to shave my pits, too.’ ‘No problem. Anyplace else need pruning?’ ‘I don’t know. I’ve never shaved anywhere else.’ She was blushing. I got my shaving cream and got to work on her. Conservatism 3: It’s shit, but it’ll get me elected.Conservatism 4: Shit is bad for the economy.Conspiracy Theory-ism: THEY shit on us!Creation-ism 1: We have proof that God made all the shit.Creation-ism 2: Shit has only been happening since October 23rd 4004 B.C.Creation-ism 3: ... And the Lord said “Let there be shit” ... and there came piles of shit.Creation-ism 4: After six days of this shit, He rested.Constipation: My shit just won’t happen.Cubism: If shit happens, you won’t recognize. More

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