He spent a lot of Friday in the downstairs john. He was alone after noon, when Reese was off to the library to work. Zeena was back at the office hold...ng down the fort, he supposed. The retching surges came just close enough that he felt there wasn't much point in wiping his mouth, rinsing, and going out to sit down. Last night he'd told the women to leave him alone, partly because he wanted to be alone in his misery, and partly because, well, he didn't want them near him.You can actually get. Now, I couldn’t stop my feelings. Every time I saw her they rose in me. Being so aware of her and knowing she wasn’t to be mine would hurt. To be so close and not to have is painful. I would come where we met to see her, then avoid her. I wouldn’t enter conversations where she was, and would leave those when she arrived. Sometimes I could control myself enough to speak, so I don’t believe she ever knew I was keeping her at a distance. It took quite a while, but one day it seemed I had accepted.. More

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