" She drinks?" Among other things." I opened the door. "I'll talk with her and she'll pass out on the couch." Virginia! I know you're in there! Open t...e damn door!"I've dealt with Joyie before when she's been drinking. She's usually like Otis, the town drunk, on Andy Griffith, but whatever she was at the moment, was as far from Mayberry as The Bronx. So, when I opened the door I was braced for a fight. I wasn't prepared to see her dad's service revolver in her hand.Feeling my heart almost stop. “I’m still a lady, remember! I don’t fart!”“No, you just break wind. So none of that, farting, breaking wind, bottom burps or whatever you want to call it while I’m kissing your backside.”She kept laughing.“You’re so bad; Will Morris, if you keep that up then I will fart in your face, so there!”“Let me go back downstairs, and get a cork to plug it up,” I said. “No, that’s no good; you’ll just blast that out and shoot me with it.”“Was that a cork, or a cock to plug it up?” she said. “I’m not. More

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