Trust me, I jerk off all the time.” “Believe me, I have tried. After years of pushing my cock into Rebecca’s tight, warm and wet pussy; my big r...ugh right hand doesn’t feel good. I can’t get off.” “You could try getting a Fleshlite. It feels pretty realistic when you use one. It might get you off and it kind of fills like a real pussy when you’re pounding your meat into it.: “Great idea, except we’re out here in the middle of nowhere for another ten days, and I don’t see a sex shop anywhere in. The only trouble was, she was coming home.A girl phoned me and said, ‘Come on over. There’s nobody home.’ I went over. Nobody was home!A hooker once told me she had a headache.I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, ‘Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?’ She said, ‘No, I hate myself now.’My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves.I’m so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.The other. More

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