You laugh at me and suggest I first swallow the overdue pills and clear my throat with the salty broth.While I do so you start asking the unpleasant q...estions right away, rubbing salt into the wound and savoring every moment of it: “The face you made staggering here looked like the expression of true regret. Was that your little walk of shame? It better be, if what you boasted about last night is true.”Your words hurt both my strained ears and my feelings. 'Why, oh why, do you have to rub in. I wash away all my fear and tension, my mind so clear, as always, during my shower. Even at home, shower time has always been a time for me to think and reflect. Its hard to remember, given how content I am, that I am also essentially a prisoner in hell. In hell. Why am I okay with this? Even under the warm water, my body begins to shake. Goosebumps rise on my arms and a shiver creeps up my neck. Why am I here? My breathing is uneven and tears spill, hot and heavy from my eyes. I cant stop the. More

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