"The mattress? You're crazy! I'm not coming. Do you think I'm going to prance down the stairs starkers?" So I should tell my father that you've decide... you don't want to accompany us to Paris and Rome this summer?' I asked, then slipped out the door of my room."Emily ... Emmmmileee," I heard hissed at my back but of course I didn't stop."Paris?" drifted down to me as I descended the stairs. Looking up I saw my best friend with her boobs hanging over the railing."Well I've agreed to feed him and. I ate a large, thin-crust pizza with cheese, sausage, pepperoni, onions, anchovies and mushrooms. It was yummy, and all the toppings were just what I like on a pizza. Then, I cut a fart that stank so bad it smelled like something crawled up my ass and died. I tried to call you, but I got some guy playing his trumpet on July 20, 1969. Then, I cut a fart that stank even worse than the fart I had expelled previously which smelled like something had crawled up my ass and died. This most recent fart. More

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