What was the deal with me, I wondered? We talked about girls like that all the time, or mostly my friends did and I just listened and gave them a hard...time about it. Why the big deal now? I'd felt hurt by what Kyle had been saying and that was new to me. It wasn't something I'd expected and I should have been able to ignore it. But I couldn't. So I was changing, wasn't I? Did I want to be a little high school hottie and have all the boys dreaming about me? I didn't think so. No, I didn't, I. My hair was now dirty blond as I could not afford to visit my stylist. I had lost weight – about ten pounds in the last two weeks – but still wasn't happy with my body. I was braless in a grey tank top, and I could feel the sagging of my 36C breasts – an event I had hoped would wait until I was well into my thirties. My nipples were showing through the grey fabric, but at this point, I didn't care. I was poor and tired and craving just about any drink or pill I could find. Javier walked around. More

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