Well, I guess I did THINK about it, I mean about ‘liking’ her ... as a girl, that is.“Uh, sure, I guess.”“You know we’ve done it.” He st...ted, emphasizing the ‘It’.The words didn’t register to me. Done it? I hadn’t even kissed a girl, much less ‘it’. I said nothing.He continued quietly, “We played doctor.”That part seemed interesting, but no big deal. I had kinda played doctor with a girl cousin, years earlier. Probably most kids have.“Last month, we did it. Well, she got scared while we watched. No balls.Long gone.I understand that all amputees have feelings like this - a sore thumb onan arm removed, a calf cramp where there is no leg. I am told that maleto female transsexuals do not feel the same thing. Maybe for them thegenitals never belonged, so they are never missed. But I am not atranssexual. I am a feminized man, surgically altered against my will.I check my forehead. I have always had plenty of hair, but before allthis it was receding in the front. They pulled my scalp. More

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