I could never have done it if it weren't for you. As for my confidence, it's all a front. I realized if I act like an indecisive wallflower they'll wa...k all over me, so I'm simply playing a role. I'm making snap decisions, assuming if I go too far off someone will pull me back, but I'd rather be wrong than have other people dictating who I should work with or what I should do. After all, this isn't about me, or even about the music. This is about you and your message, and I don't want anyone. Perhaps I was partly to blame forblurring the line between what was acceptable behavior and what was not. I chose for the moment to ignore that fact that I hadn't been exactlypure and virtuous given my relationship with Mark...I started to replay in my head the words Sarah had said. I had to admitto myself that some of what she said was perfectly true. My life - ourlife - wasn't real. Our life together had become a strange, artificialcocooned existence. Our entire lives, except for Sarah's. More

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