Now that the opening ceremonies are over, its time to have a moment of silence.D: Please take this moment to remember all the men who lost a testicle ...t last year's Ballbusting Olympics.[Dan looks mortified as short videos of the now half-men competing played at the bottom of the screen. Elly tried to stifle her laughter. This was not a skill she had.]D: Thank you all for your respect. [Dan gives Elly a dirty look]E: [still laughing] It's time to introduce the different events for this year's. I knew my height; Father marked my bedroom door post at random intervals. I knew my shoe size was large for my age, that I would grow as tall, possibly taller, than my father. I knew my hands were small, too small to span an octave on Mother's piano. My uncircumcised penis was one hundred and eighteen millimeters in length when erect. I also knew the circumference of my head at birth, thirty four centimeters.I didn't understand the significance of this, except Father once called me, I believe. More

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