But I managed to nod politely which he totally ignore,"Why have you changed the fucking locks?" he demanded,"Because I fucking well wanted to" Mum sai... smiling at him sweetly and if you keep on swearing at me like that, I'll call the police to get you removed,"I'm not going anywhere until I get my money" Dad" I began but he looked at me like I was dirt,"Don't fucking call me dad" he said with a sneer, "She went with any fucker who smiled at her"I bent down close to him and smelt the booze on. ’ Then he fell asleep again.His wife had never heard him say that before, so she stayed by his side. A few minutes later his eyes fluttered open and he said, ‘You’re cute... ‘ The wife was disappointed because instead of ‘beautiful, ‘ it was now ‘cute.’She asked, ‘What happened to beautiful?’The man replied, ‘The drugs are wearing off.’A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, ‘I almost had an affair with another woman.’ The priest said, ‘What do you mean, almost?’. More

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