" Like he's kissing her butt?" Precisely madam president."—Rowena walked hesitantly onto the stage, she felt naked. She was naked, but it felt worse...than that. Across the stage was the alien president, he did look like a headless humpback gorilla from this angle. Getting closer she could see that he was hairless, his skin was dark and looked more like a grained leather jacket. That was more or less as expected, their sun flooded their planet with much more UV light than earth, a tougher skin. Tell her to eat one of these a day and to watch what she eats and she'll be lean and mean in about three months." He handed me a package of Mint-O-Licious butter mints, something she loves. "Only one a day," he said, "or it won't work." "I wish I could lose weight that easily," I remarked. He smiled at me and patted my hand. "I wouldn't worry about that," he said. "Besides, your clothes wouldn't fit and your pants would fall off." "I didn't mean instantly," I replied, "just easily." You'll be. More

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