. but we won't talk about i more because you're pretty hetero.Anyway after that you travelled the world, beating records, hunting bounties, racing, sl...eping with models and getting richer and richer!It wasn't until you were 23 that you realized that your powers had much more to them than you thought, you were once again blackout drunk, crashing your car into a field of corn and pissing on a fence when a huge alien UFO abducted you. Inside the craft were two aliens, oddly humanoid with blue. "I was afraid of that," she said. "You know I wish I'd never brought it up. I mean, I don't even have anyone to shop for, and if I did, I don't know how I'd get gifts to them, and ... What is so funny?"What was so funny was a thought I'd had while she was talking."It just occurred to me that I could play Santa Claus and deliver them."Her hand flew to her mouth as she started to giggle. "Oh, my God! That is too funny! Can you imagine when people woke up Christmas morning and started opening. More

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