I was fuming, I really was. As soon as I understood this was really the Pope, something snapped. I legged it out of the kitchen, found a backdoor that...led to a courtyard where they kept the bins and looked for something to kick. A green, plastic recyclables container had a distinctly vexatious attitude, so I kicked that for a bit. Then I checked Wikipedia to make extra sure George was in fact the Pope. And then I checked the last edits on that page, to make extra extra sure his picture hadn’t. With a confidence fuelled by drinks, and a burning excitement caused by my abandonment, I replied to his message. “Give me a little while to take a picture and send it. You might want to go make a drink and get a snack. This may take a while.” Rick laughed, telling me to take my time. I rushed to the bathroom and re-touched my make-up, suddenly feeling a lot more sober and nervous. My hand shook as I tried to reapply my eyeliner. My cheeks didn’t need any blusher; they were rosy enough with. More

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