I thanked him for his suggestions and made the font change. I didn't even mind the implied criticism.I posted the story, it was a little out of place ...ecause the site specializes in erotica, but they allowed about anything legal to be posted.It was up for less than eight hours and I started getting emails. Most were complimentary but several with some sincere criticism. I went back and did a thorough spell and punctuation check, and fixed some run on sentences, also paragraphs were too long.. Heather and what's-her-name." Gosh, well, Heather's boobs... uh, breasts... are much bigger than yours... but that is not a bad thing... for you, I mean. She is kind of plump and all, so hers... well, they sort of sag down a lot... they wiggle, you know, like Jell-O or something when she walks. I like yours much better... I mean I have never really seen hers like all the way... just in a swimsuit... but well... hers are floppy."That evoked a short laugh from both Doris and Michael."That other. More

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