Perhaps it was the effect of the coffee, but within minutes of closing Linda Shoesmith's front door, I felt ready to take on all comers.It must be tim... for another one of those little author's asides which are so tending to break up the narrative flow round here. I did not screw Linda Shoesmith. All these sleazy, twee little double-entendres are not my style. If I fuck a woman, I will tell you. You will be the first - or more likely, the third - to know. I repeat, I did not screw Linda. When the waxing wasdone, my legs were on fire. The salon staffer rubbed insome lotion to cool the pain, and I was once again in thehands of my wife. "The things we do for beauty. Are youalright, honey? Your legs look great." Some encouragementfor someone just through an ordeal. "You know, I thinkmaybe we should have your arms done." My face fell, but Iknew that I would probably be back for another appointment.Joanne was a detail person.Back at the bridal shop, Joanne, Cheryl, and Jolene. More

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