I could envisage myself with a man, butnot any particular man.I knew deep down that my current situation was not where I wanted to be.The idea of bein... a part time cross dresser did not appeal to me at all.The idea of being an almost full time cross dresser did not appeal. Iknew that I had to decide. Do I want to be a woman or do I want to stayas a man? I knew that I did not want to live as a gay man. The elephantin the room was that if I transitioned, I would always be a sterilewoman, who had. “Johnny?” she asked, a unusually plaintive tone in her voice.“Yeah, Rachel?” I responded softly.“I tink I love yuh, okay?” she said.“I think I love you, too,” I replied.She kissed my cheek softly, and I smiled.I wasn’t sure, then. But now I know. I know. I am more sure that I love Rachel then I am of any other concept in the world.We were lost in our own companionship as the train rocketed along. The scenery was mesmerizing as we moved. It was pretty. It was boring. It was all part of looking. More

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