There's an ad for "Bear Removers."He calls the number and the man says he'll be over in 30 minutes.The bear remover arrives and gets out of his van.He...s got a ladder, a baseball bat, 12-gauge shotgun, and a mean heavily scarred old dog."What are you going to do?" the homeowner asks."I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof, then I'm going to go up there and I'll knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat.When the bear falls off the roof, the dog is trained to grab his testicles. “I think you would be surprised just how fun Aunt Megan can be, besides you will get to stay right on the beach.”He looked around nervously.“Don’t take everything your mother says about Megan to heart either, she has always been jealous of her.”Megan was the youngest of my dad’s siblings and it was common knowledge that she was a menopause baby and hadn’t been planned. She was quite a bit younger than the rest of them with there being nearly eight years between her and my father. She may not. More

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