Make her feel pain that I was feeling. I told her about all the jokes I had to listen to from classmates about how fucking big my mom's jugs were. T...at what she'd preached to me about being a "good" boy, had ended up pushing me into sex instead. "Yeah mom your good son has sex...lots and lots of sex. Maybe you can talk about that at CCD classes this week."I could see tears forming in her eyes, which tore me apart. I didn't want to make her cry and I reasoned that if she hadn't precipitated. She was evermore normal with each discovery, and more enchanting for it.The cordless phone saved me when it trilled into life.“Hello?”“Why don’t you answer your phone?” an irate Peter asked.“In case it slipped by you, I am answering my phone,” I pointed out pleasantly.“Not this phone. Your cell phone.”“I lost it.”“Again? Where?”Did he understand how Kafkaesque this conversation was becoming? “If I knew that, it wouldn’t be lost.”“Oh. Right. I’ll get you another. This makes three, Mike. Maybe. More

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