He had wanted to leave because he didn't like where things were going. My actions were the final straw. He left without telling me. I found out and ta...ked to my parents realizing how serious the situation was and that it was mostly my fault."Charles agreed to see me under limited circumstances and forced a thirty day separation on me. He told me that he didn't expect to see me at the end of it but would give me that opportunity. He said that I would be able to pick a new guy. He held out. For the fantasy to be true, I would have to have had an older brother - and I didn't.In fact, my lack of an older brother is a major element of my life.The reality is that I was the oldest of several children. The fact that I was the first born - and a daughter, not a son - was an irritant to my father. It wasn't how he envisioned his family.As a girl I wasn't - and could never be - my father's eldest son. And yet I was expected to fill the role that he had assigned for his oldest child, the. More

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