The following day I built up enough courage to head back down to the bar to see if Jon would be there. Part of me hoped not, the dirty slutty part of ...e hoped he was, I needed to be used and humiliated again. I'd missed a week of uni lectures and this was to be my punishment.I put on my stockings, corset and panties under my jeans and t-shirt and walked through town. On the way I spotted a pair of girls loafers in the shop window and thought sod it, went in and bought them. As soon as I was. I wasn’t consciously thinking anything about the possibility of homosexuality when I was with Donny, but in retrospect, subconsciously I was falling in love with him.I can admit to myself now, after all that has happened, that I was a closet queen in denial for most of my life. For a while, when I was a young teen, I used to cross dress in secret. But I hated myself for it and pretended to loath “faggots,” even though part of me knew I might be one. But I fought it and when I was 23 I met. More

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