I offer it only as an example of how not to do dialect because it is bloody difficult to read. Oh yes, and I used Lord Lucan as a nom dee ploom becaus... I can see the old family seat from my window. Or I could if the snow would let up. I don't expect a TPA greater than 1.1.1., but you can please yourselves, and I'm sure you will"Interstishul' yer say?"There I is, sat in a corner of the local's bar in the 'Jovial Tar'. What a bloody daft name that be. 'Twere the Jolly Sailor afore all they. What are you doing?”“I’m moving deep in my darling. Moving without coming out. Showing my love for the one who excites me by exciting her.”“That’s so romantic. But why kiss my forehead when you can kiss my lips?”“Because I love all of you. And you, in turn, should raise your knees and spread them so I can get as deep into you as I can.”“Like this?”“Precisely. Do you feel how deep I am within you?”“Oh yes ... Oh!”“That’s it, my darling. Take all of me. Take my longest strokes.”“Oh ... Oh! .... More

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