Edna answered and with stern face, said: Jason, I am very upset that your mummy has asked me to help her. I understand she is fed up with you constant...y masturbating and that you won’t get a young girl to relieve your erection problems. Come in and you can tell me about it.’Sitting next to him on the sofa she asked ‘Jason, why won’t you get a girlfriend your own age? ‘Well, Edna young ladies just don’t do it for me – not after Mrs Hill our neighbour took my cherry when I was 14. She was lovely. After the cannon had fired the sponge-man would extinguish any glowing embers in the barrel with the wet sponge, preparatory for a fresh powder charge to be loaded. Of course our plan was not to fire a single shot so no sponging would be carried out, but it did allow for a bucket of water to be placed near the muzzle of the cannon. Around six of the afternoon we heard the sounds of singing, and I looked out to see a column of marchers, headed by a large number of young women carrying. More

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