The big, floppy recliner I sit in is the only thing really in focus. The room is bright, but grey and indistinct, because it’s not really important....ou are there. I see you are… smaller than you are. And grayer. And cold, sad. I beckon you to me and you climb onto my lap. My arms encircle you as you curl up. I feel larger than I am. Stronger. I hold you, stroking you hair and back through your sweatshirt. You are shivering. You may be crying. There is wetness seeping though my shirt. I hold you. We played cards and had two more shots. I was feeling the tequila and she was slurring her words. When it took her three tries to shuffle, I said I’d had enough tequila.“I’ve had enough damn cards!” she laughed and managed to get the deck into its box. We trundled off to bed. She watched me strip while doing the same herself. We crawled under the sheets and snuggled. After we made out a while, Carla smiled at me and said, “I thought more about you with another guy. I’m liking the idea more and. More

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