‘Your flight leaves at two so we have to be on the road by ten. I’ll be here at nine-thirty.’ Gale nodded and got out of the car, the bouquet in...his hands. Velvet answered the door at the first ring, wearing a robe and fluffy slippers, her hair hanging in curly tendrils around her face. She smiled and opened the door, welcoming him into her home. ‘Hi.’ He bent to give her a kiss and she placed two fingers against his lips. ‘Hold on a minute.’ He watched as she grabbed a plastic bag and dashed. As the young ladies got on, one exclaimed in a posh, condescending voice. “Driver, please wipe up that H2O on the floor.”The driver smirked as he said ‘That’s not H2O, darling that’s K9P.”A young man was rapidly approaching his wedding day, but he didn’t have a clue how to perform. Oh he knew what to do, as his mates had told him, “Stick it in, in and out, pull it out and wipe it.” This didn’t seem right, he wanted to satisfy his new bride on the wedding night, so he went to see the old man of. More

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