" It hadn't happened to me, maybe because I'd been wanking myself ever since the age of seven. I'd discovered at a very early age that when you ru... your foreskin back and forth it felt 'oh so nice' and it culminated in a tickling sensation that was out of this world and if you did it stood up against a wall your legs became weak with the thrilling intensity of it all. "I've had it once or twice," said Jeff, "can't get to sleep again after, 'cause everywhere's wet and it's fuckin'. ‘What’s this?’ ‘It’s a car, Michael, a limousine, a brand new Cadillac.’ ‘Yeah, I know that it is a car but what is the occasion?’ ‘Get in, Pop. We need to talk.’ With that, the chauffer emerged from the driver’s side and appeared at the passenger side door opening it for Michael. Ralphie slid across the leather seat to make room for his best friend. ‘Thanks,’ said Michael looking at the chauffer resplendent in his stiff cap and navy blue uniform complete with shiny, brass buttons. He got in. More

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